You Crave What You Have

When in Kindergarten kid draws something and parents say 'this is the best drawing they have seen' and the kid starts loving to draw. The more you get better at it, and the more you get noticed the more you feel good about it. You are good at it and you are obsessed with it. You want more? Does it start here? Don't know.

Contrary to expectations you are most insecure and most obsessed about something you have in abundance. If you are a good cook you crave it more and more, you want to cook and get people to praise it more. If you are a Sachin Tendulkar you have all the records but you still obsess to get one more to the kitty because... you already have so many?!. Their is never a point when you say - I already have this and be ok with it. The feeling becomes an addiction and this takes over. So for a human when he doesn't have something then he laments that he is a have-not but when he has something then he not satisfied either and is obsessed with that attribute because of the inherent insecurity.

If you are rich then you think money is more important than others think of it. You somehow need more of it to survive. Rich people tend to think that poor should always be thinking of making money and save and often label them irresponsible in case they find them spending it or just having fun rather than always pursuing 'money making', because in their mind the poor people should need it more.

We also tend to give more importance to our achievements than others care to. If you got into a prestigious university or passed a much coveted exam then you make it a bigger deal of it than it is. You buy into slogans like ... the entire country wanted to do this but only chosen few did it. Really the entire country barely knows about that achievement and is not after it at all due to their own compulsions of life. Same with education, job, career, etc.

There is another side to it, if the achievement has fallen in your lap with no input of your own, then it somehow becomes even more coveted. If you live in a big city like New York or Mumbai .... you obsess about what you got, then you suddenly are in spotlight of representing that big city as if everything about it was made by you. Same with getting born in a culture or caste or class. Same with religion, region, and country. None of it is your making or choice but now that it fell in your lap it is so much more important.

 

All this may seem to be positive but somehow it all flows out as a negative trait more than positive.